


Chances

by Iris13



Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
Genre: F/F, do not copy to other websites
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-24
Updated: 2019-09-24
Packaged: 2020-10-27 15:14:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 645
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20762453
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Iris13/pseuds/Iris13
Summary: Adora thinks about her complicated relationship with Catra, and where it might lead them. Short, sad.





	Chances

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this in august 2019 before I saw Adora's letter. It feels closer to canon now after reading the letter so thought I might as well post it. Enjoy!

I've given you chances, so many chances. And yet every time, you reject me.

It still hurts.

And still I wish you would say yes. Take the hand that I offer you. ‘Come with me.’ That you would let me save you. ‘Come with  _ me.’ _

But no.

You say I left you. I guess I did. But I tried to make you see, tried to take you with me. But you are not easy to deal with, your will is so strong. Too strong. I didn’t at first, because I was too angry, but now I regret that I didn’t try harder. You have no idea how this guilt feels. You only care about your pain. 

I wish I could tell you that I’m sorry. But it’s too late now. You won’t listen now.

I wish I could be with you. Like before. But without the fighting. Without the horde. Without the rebellion. Just us. 

Sparring, the clinking of weapons. The sound of your voice, your taunts and teasing, your laughter, and that damned giggle. The way you shriek when you’re excited, or when you’re surprised. The soft sound of your swift feet against the ground as you close in on me. The weight of your body on mine. The metallic smell of the training grounds. And wanting to take you down. Pin you to the floor. Push you down, make you submit to me. 

Even with your back to the floor, with a weapon against your throat, you will still smile like you just won. 

That smile keeps me up at night.

My new life is very lonely at night. Sleeping all alone is something that took time to get used to. Glimmer and Bow helped me transition, they would do sleepovers every now and then. But eventually I got used to it. But I still wake up every now and then, and wonder where you are.

Your small form, sleeping at the foot of our bed. All curled up. Seeing your chest expand, and fall back. Wanting nothing more than to wake you up, to straddle you. To challenge you. 

To see that look in your eyes, that strong will. That unbendable will. You won’t bend to anyone. Not to me. Not even to freedom. 

_ A branch that doesn't bend,  _

_ breaks. _

Still I miss it. The warmth of your body, the strength of your will. The way you would touch me, bump into me on purpose. To rouse me. I wish you would look at me like you used to, with fondness.

You made me feel like I was the only one who knew who you really were.

I'm slowly realising that I will never experience your friendship again. 

The thing that kept me sane all those years was you. It was you. Knowing that I had you in my future. Feeling safe with you. You. Only truly safe with you. Why did you not come with me?

It’s all gone now. There is no turning back. There is no safety now.

I did what I thought was the right thing, I couldn’t have gone back once I knew the truth. I couldn’t go back to what we had in the horde. I didn’t realize the price I had to pay.

The only future I can see inevitably leads to us to one of our deaths. One of us at the sharp end of the other’s blade.

I should’ve gone back for you.

I’m not ready. I’m not ready to give up, but I can’t keep doing this.

I don’t want to hurt you, but at this point, I will not hesitate anymore. I won’t submit to you. Even when I strike you, I still wish you would surrender. Surrender to  _ me _ . But I must let go of that. I realise that more than anyone.

Perhaps I will live with this guilt forever. 


End file.
